After a very long time, I have had the chance to surf the channels leisurely today and watch some TV. Our cable, E-vision, has been generous to offer ALL the channels free of cost for three days, as an Eid present to their loyal subscribers.
I surfed through some 1980s-1990s Hindi and Pakistani movies. After an hour of watching random desi movies, I noticed a few things which are very common to almost all of these movies.
The Hero’s Mother
More often than not, the hero’s mother turns out to be a poor widow, clad in white saree.
She is almost always blind.
She loses her son (s) in one tragic way or the other while the boys are still young, and conveniently finds them back when they are grown men. This way, the hero’s mother doesn’t even have to worry about finances involved in raising her son (s) and schooling.
The Leading Lady
She is always rude and angry with the hero at the start of the movie.
When chased or captured by the bad guys, this otherwise gentle and soft-spoken lady, never forgets to throw some heavy “curse” words at them.
While the hero tries to save her by bravely fighting off the bad guys single-handedly, the leading lady stands there watching, instead of running off to safety or calling for help.
The doctors in our desi movies are very silly characters. First of all, they don’t even look like professional medical practitioners, which means they don’t chose the right actor to play the part.
The doctor usually pays home visits to the hero’s poor family, with the hero walking behind him, clutching the black medical bag.
After randomly placing the stethoscope all over the patient’s chest and doing nothing else, the doctor usually says,”This case is very serious. I’ve done everything that I could. I’m sorry.”
The Fighting Scene
The muscular, well-groomed hero always fights overweight, dirty, and yellow-shirt-on-red-pants-wearing bad guys.
The hero will seem to lose the fight, lying on the street injured to the point of death, until he sees that the bad guys are after the leading lady. Once the hero is back on his feet, he becomes invulnerable, even to bullets.
Regardless of how the hero or his leading lady are injured: car accident, fall from a building, hitting a stone, being shot on the leg, drowned in the river, or beaten by the bad guys, the injury is almost always on the forehead.
There will be a white bandage neatly wrapped around the forehead, with a distinct red “blood’ spot on one side.
The Police arrives on the scene once the hero is done beating the bad guys black and blue.
Those who are dying get time to deliver their 10-minute lines before eventually passing away in the arms of the hero.
The entire cast gathers at one place, all of them facing the camera.